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Mr. Boyd wasn’t prepared for fatherhood upon the arrival of his first
child. He struggled with navigating the ropes of being a
father and being present in his child’s life.
“The first two to
three years of my daughter's life, I was inactive. I wasn't
really responsible. I didn’t step up as a man until I had
grown a little bit older, then I started to be an active
father and getting to know about my baby instead of running
around as a teenager.”
Boyd heard about Brothers United while he was in prison and joined the
program because he believed he had finally found something
he could relate to.
“I did three and a
half years in prison and had never seen a program that had
anything to do with brothers just based on our culture, our
people, or fatherhood.”
Before BU, Boyd wasn’t getting along with his co-parent because he
wasn’t good at communicating and taking out their personal
issues to focus solely on the kids.
Brothers United helped Boyd grow as a man and as a father. He learned
how to communicate as well as manage his money with better
responsibility.
“BU helped me
really see how much it actually takes to provide for a child
when it comes to food, clothing, shelter and the bills the
woman has to take care of by herself when the woman is not
with that other parent. I stopped being so petty and picking
on them when they couldn't make ends meet. I blamed
everything on them instead of taking some of the
responsibility because even though we're not together, a lot
of bills that they face alone I believe the men should still
help out with that stuff because that's where your child has
to stay.”
By going through BU and having a community of fathers who he could learn
from, Mr. Boyd learned that fatherhood is more than just
financial. It’s being present in your child’s life.
“A lot of us think
we can buy our way into our kids’ lives just by spoiling
them with shoes and clothes and material things, when our
time and just playing with them means so much more. Just
being a man of respect and trying to be a better example,
what I set for my children, what they see me do, they'll
eventually do or see as normal or ok.”
After graduating from the Brothers United Program, Mr. Boyd got out of
prison and changed his habits. He got his license, was able
to have all of his kids under one roof for the first two
years after his release, and at 33 years old, he got his
first job.
“This time was
different. BU helped me to be more of a standup guy. It made
me more in touch with myself and the roles I play in my
children’s lives and family’s life.”
If you are interested in joining The Brothers United Program or have
someone you want to refer : Call us at (4199) 279-6297 or
www.pathwaytoledo.org
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