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Eight Surefire Ways to Get Shot by a Cop!

By Lafe Tolliver, Esq
Guest Column

Well, as you may have heard, a black woman in Fort Worth, Texas was recently shot and killed in her home by a Fort Worth police officer.

     Atatiana Jefferson, 28, was in her home with her eight-year-old nephew playing video games when the police officer arrived due to a tip by a neighbor that the Jefferson door was wide open.

     The cop responded, with gun drawn (it was supposed to be a “wellness checkup call” according to the calling neighbor) and after he did a tactical search of the outside of the house (it was at 2 AM), he saw a “shadow” in a window in the house and yelled something to the effect of, “Show me your hands!”
 



Lafe Tolliver, Esq

     When the shadow did not respond, he immediately opened fired and killed the homeowner.

     Of course, the police are investigating it and are trying to dampen down the impact of this house shooting coming on the heels of the recent police shooting in Dallas of Botham Jean by the cop, Amber Guyger.

     As you may know, in Texas, there is an open carry law and a “Castle” law, so the homeowner was totally within her rights to arm up when she saw, in the dark, an unknown person carrying a flashlight out and about her property.

    According to Texas law, she had every right to be armed in her own home and to stand and defend herself and her property from this yet to be known possibly armed intruder.

    Too little, too late for Ms. Jefferson. She was immediately determined to be a threat and was promptly disposed of by this trigger-happy cop (according to reports, he has resigned from the police force).

    Again, a black person meets her fate at the end of a barrel of a police gun and again, she is minding her own business not knowing that in a few seconds, she will be thrust into eternity by a person who is ostensibly supposed to protect and serve.

    This leads me to compile a list of activities that you can be engaged in but if you are confronted by the wrong police officer, you hopefully will have burial insurance and a church home in which to have the after-funeral repast.

    So, here they are in no particular order. Remember! If you are engaged in any of these activities, beware you may not know that you are being watched and are now targeted for an easy and deadly kill shot!

     Note: If you are the shooter, simply say, “I was fearful for my live or he/she made a “furtive” move and I shot in self-defense!”  It works almost 95 percent of the time!

One: You are in a laundromat and as you are reaching into the deep dryer to pull out clothes, you pull out a shiny object (the metal strap to your bra); and the nervous onsite security guard sees it and panics and shoots you. Moral of the story: stop wearing bras!

Two: You are at Kroger and you have a sudden asthma attack!

You drop the package, it makes a loud metallic sound and you reach for your inhaler which is in your waistband, the off-duty cop sees you reaching for a shiny object and says, “Halt!” but you continue, not realizing that he is yelling at you. Too bad! By the time you look up, you have been shot four times in the chest.

Moral of the story: Attach your inhaler to your collar for all to see.

Three: Your daughter, Tyl-Linquella, just arrived at the school dance. As she exits the car, you tell her to call you. You drive away but at some distance your car backfires and your daughter takes out her silver phone to call you to make sure the car is OK.  The off-duty police officer hears the backfire thinking it is a gun and sees you standing there with a shiny object in your hand. The next thing you know, you are in surgery for a gunshot wound to the head. Moral of the story: stop going to school dances!

Four:  You are at college. You just came back from the grocer with two packages and are about to carry them up the outside stairs to your apartment. The undercover cops are on a stake out looking for someone in a striped shirt with dark green pants. You are wearing a white shirt and brown shorts. You are told to stop but you keep on going up the stairs. The two cops approach you with guns drawn. You slowly put down the bags and turn to them.

One officer yells out, “He’s got a gun!” The last look on your puzzled face is, “whaaaaa?” Moral of the story: It is best to order groceries on-line and have them delivered to you.

Five: You are driving in Ottawa Hills in a hooptie of a car. You do a “Californa stop” at a stop sign and blue lights appear in your rear-view mirror. You pull over to the side, roll down your window and turn off the radio. The cop comes up and asks for your registration and insurance. You say, “Sure, officer…” and reach for your glove compartment. Inside you accidentally knock out the silver flashlight onto the floor.

The officer panics and says, “Gun!” You look up and see the barrel of his gun at your head. Bingo! You are history.

Moral of the story: When driving at night, use Uber or Lyft and then the driver will get shot, not you.

Six: You are at a park with your two girls when you see two police officers approaching you. You nervously wonder what this is about to be. The cops say that two women reported that there is a black man chasing around two little girls who are screaming.

You tell the cops that those two girls are your kids and you are playing hide and seek. The officers tell you to get on your knees so they can cuff you, but you resist saying that you have done nothing wrong. You reach inside your coat for your picture ID showing that you are an assistant professor at Toledo University. Bad move! One officer thinks he saw a butt of a gun and fires three shots. One hit their mark.

Moral of the story:  Do not go to public places and make fun with your kids. It can be very dangerous.

Seven:  Your brother is accused of shoplifting by a story security detective. You are across the store floor but start to come to the scene of the incident. The cop tries puts your brother in a choke hold and you protest and struggle to free your brother, but you do not touch the cop. The cop yells and the other store cop comes over and shoots you thinking you were trying to reach for the detective gun. Moral of the story: Whenever possible, shop alone.

Eight: You are in your backyard listening to a ballgame. Suddenly, a person runs into your yard being chased by three police officers. You sit there and wonder what is going on!

You get up and go into the house to get your cellphone to record to what is happening. When you return and raise the camera up, one of the cop yells, “Gun!” You wake up later in a hospital with no feeling from your neck on down. Moral of the story:

It is better to listen to sport programming inside a house…not outside.

    As you can see, police can and will invent practically any excuse to use deadly force when other least drastic means are available to the officer to defuse the situation.

     But these cops seemingly would rather rely upon deadly force than engage themselves into a fray so that innocent lives are not lost.

     What does all this mean? Simple: Any confrontation with police can be a deadly encounter and for reasons that you had nothing to do with. Remedy? Demand how police are taught at the academy on the use of deadly force and other means of control that do not involve your family meeting with members of The Day Funeral Home.

Contact Lafe Tolliver at tolliver@juno.com

 
   
   


Copyright © 2019 by [The Sojourner's Truth]. All rights reserved.
Revised: 10/25/19 01:29:41 -0400.


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